Living life in purpose and flowing with the momentum allows a discovery of tomorrow with eagerness and anticipation. Too many times we find ourselves responding to people, circumstances or things with a preprogrammed download of emotions….baggage we carry with us from yesterday or yesteryear. To fully engage the flow, to fully embrace today and to manifest the tomorrow of our dreams, it becomes imperative that we let go and release that which weighs heavy on our hearts, souls and spirits. This release is accomplished through the simplicity and the magic of Forgiveness.
Embracing our anger, resentments, hurt feelings, bitterness or ill will towards any person, event or thing relinquishes our personal power. Sadly enough, we surrender this power by blaming others for these hurts and pains whether or not the transgression was a real experience or simply some misperception. The symptoms manifesting in our physical body and mental thoughts are a product of a mind that cannot differentiate between offenses or events which were intentional, accidental, and circumstantial or created from the fallible thinking of a sensitive psyche.
Whom should we forgive? Being able to forgive and release past hurts is a critical tool for any relationship. This includes those relationships you want to maintain and those you want to move away from. The list includes, but is by no way limited to, parents, siblings, children, other family members, neighbors, bosses, employees, spouses, significant others, ex- spouses, former significant others, ex-fiancé’s, friends, the guy who cut you off in traffic and the woman who took your parking space. For me, Forgiveness also extends to events. Let’s take, for example, natural disasters, such as Hurricanes Andrew, Charley or Katrina. Your home is damaged or fully destroyed. Your possessions have been damaged, swept away, or looted. No one is personally responsible. You were not personally targeted by the storms, although you may feel as if you were. You feel vulnerable, powerless and frightened. Many people will want to blame the government or the National Hurricane Center. The truth is they did not cause the event. Anger does not repair the damage to your house or to your soul. I have personally experienced the devastation of both Hurricane Andrew in 1992 and Charley in 2004. There was a phenomenon that occurred after Andrew. Like many others, I found myself waking up at 3:30 a.m. for months after the storm. This early morning hour represented the time that Andrew’s first bands of winds and rains made their terrifying entrance Miami Dade
Although Charley hit Punta Gorda in the late afternoon, I again, began to wake up at 3:30 a.m. after the storm. Hurricane Charley caused me to relive the events that I had experienced twelve years earlier. I did not realize that I was harboring resentment and bitterness towards the storm. I knew that in order to survive the stress of Charley, I had to forgive Andrew. We give these events names, and along with that name, we build personalities. Andrew took over two years of my life. He stole all my material possessions. He took my community. He robbed me of my security. Andrew violated me in a way that no other person or thing had ever done. With the impact of Charley, I now had two violators. I could choose to remain a victim of Andrew and allow him to dictate how I would recover from Charley. Or, I could forgive the storm and proceed with rebuilding my life once again.
So how do you create the magic of Forgiveness?
1) Make the Decision to Forgive.
You have a choice to forgive. It is the conscious decision to release the negativity of the past, to acknowledge that your pain is not the final say in the matter and to move forward. In this decision, you reclaim your power by taking responsibility for yourself and allowing others to do the same. Forgiveness is a deliberate act of release on the part of the injured party. It is not dependent on the intention, remorse or repentance of the wrongdoer.
2) Release the Past
There is nothing you can do to change yesterday. You do have power, however, over how you react and think about yesterday. You have the power over what is happening today. It is in what you choose to focus on and how you choose to respond in this present moment that determines the quality of your tomorrows. Forgiveness prevents past performance from affecting your future.
3) Forgive Yourself
There is one person that you blame more than any other for things that go wrong in your day or life. This is the person you expect to support you on the path to manifesting your dreams. This is the person in your life that handles all your challenges and adversities. This is the person you require the most from and can be disappointed the most by. In order to go forward in purpose, face life’s challenges and to achieve your goals and dreams, you must forgive yourself
Reflection: Forgiveness dares you to release the hurt and pain in order to regain your foothold on the path of your purpose and the mastery of your goals and the manifestation of your dreams.